July 31, 2003

doggone weird

I find this to be a bit creepy looking...

Posted by mikewolf at 02:39 PM | Comments (5)

college sports are funny

Someone at the University of Florida needs to retake biology 101 and Rick Majerus should have simply called for room service.

Posted by mikewolf at 11:13 AM | Comments (3)

July 30, 2003

left of center

Bill Maher has a blog and I have a new role model.

Posted by mikewolf at 03:00 PM | Comments (2)

July 29, 2003

more moorer

Dean requested these, so visit Notes From Slipping Acres if you hate them. Visit him if you love them, too.

Actually, Dean will absolutely hate them. I'll bet on that. Steve Winwood is a fan, Dean. Will that help? I'm not kidding, either.

Whatcha think, kids?

Break Before I Bend (right-click, save as)
Day You Said Goodbye (right-click, save as)
Think It Over (right-click, save as)

Posted by mikewolf at 07:42 PM | Comments (1)

July 28, 2003

hang 'em high

Can I rant for just a minute? Good...

I run BlackIce software on this PC as a firewall. It sometimes causes me problems when I post here as it thinks that Moveable Type is some sort of malicious script. As a result, I usually disable it for just a bit when I post. Tonight I did just that. It was down for all of two minutes. During that tiny span I somehow got a nasty virus that just took me over an hour to clean up. I f*cking hate hackers.

Posted by mikewolf at 10:43 PM | Comments (1)

miss fortune

An acquaintance "in the business" was kind enough to provide me with a copy of Allison Moorer's recent live DVD/CD release "Show" a few weeks ago. I haven't had much time to spend with it until this evening but, let me tell ya, it's an amazing piece. It's also fairly depressing in its display of virtually everything that is wrong with the music industry.

First, I defy you to find a singer of any sort with a voice as powerful and passionate as Allison's. Go ahead. You can't. I promise. I'll post MP3s tomorrow if anyone cares to dispute the fact. With such talent Moorer should be setting Nashville afire. She's not. In fact, she bounced from one label to another until seemingly finding a happy home at Universal South. Nope. They dropped her, too.

Instead she's left to stand on her own, flogging her way through the Neanderthal business of Nashville. She doesn't sound like Shania, she doesn't play pop like Faith. Instead she stands before the overflowing crowd at 12th & Porter defiantly belting out a new song called "Break Before I Bend." The song is great and the moment is electric.

It wears on my patience when I talk to those deejays
at the corporation station they slather on false praise
even though I'm slow I know no radio will give my record spins
lean on me all you want to, I'll break before I bend

Way up in those ivory towers with gold records on the walls
all the big wigs got the power but they ain't got the balls
the desk bound clowns that run this town have watered down the sound just like their gin
lean on me all you want to, I'll break before I bend

Hell yeah I'd love to make it but I suck at playing games
I'd rather starve than fake it for a little taste of fame
it's wrong to be a doggone pawn singing songs that make you yawn for payments on a long mercedes benz
lean on me all you want to, I'll break before I bend

But, my dear readers, that is just the beginning of the lessons that "Show" teaches. At one point Allison calls for her "lovely sister" to join her on stage. For the uninitiated, Allison's sister is the Grammy winning drunk commonly known as Shelby Lynne. Allison looks embarassed as Shelby slurs,

"Sorry it took me so long to get up here, sis, I was back there drinkin'. Oh. Shhh. Sorry"

"That's okay. I don't think it's a secret," Moorer replies.

Shelby then proceeds to butcher three songs with Allison. She's clearly just there to sell product.

Even more disturbing is the appearance of one Bob Richie. a.k.a. Kid Rock. Some of you who listen to Top 40 radio have probably heard Mr. Rock's duet with Sheryl Crow. The song, "Picture," originally appeared on his album "Cocky." Well, it seems that Kid thought this track to be "the finest song he'd ever written" (and you thought he couldn't top "Bawitdaba") and deserved to be released as a single. Crow balked at the notion of releasing the country ballad so Allison was called in to re-record the vocals for a new release to coincide with Farm Aid. The result was a surprise hit. Perhaps the biggest surprise, though, was which version was the hit. Radio got a new appreciation for the song and decided to play the cut from "Cocky". Crow, of course, then had a sudden change of heart and allowed her version to also be released as a single. Moorer was left in the cold yet again.

So I appeal to you, readers of randomness, to help ol' Allison out when the industry lets her down. You don't need to pick up "Show." It was released to fulfill her obligation to Universal South. Keep your eye out for her on the road, though, in a city near you. I promise you'll be a convert.

Posted by mikewolf at 09:11 PM | Comments (4)

say it ain't so?!

Liza & David? Done already? Perhaps Liza would be better off marrying a straight guy next time? Poor thing. It's really odd, isn't it? Liza married to Peter Allen and Gest, her mother married to Vincent Minnelli and Mark Herron.

Oh, by the way, I remain convinced that Bob Hope has really been dead for about five years. They just wanted to get him over the century mark. "Okay, it's been a couple of months since his birthday. Let's make an annoucement."

Posted by mikewolf at 10:56 AM | Comments (2)

July 25, 2003

a token

Here. Take a look at this. See how long it takes before you think you're going insane. Do you see what I mean?

Posted by mikewolf at 05:17 PM | Comments (7)

a note from the management

We at randomness would like to thank you for your continued patience and patronage during our momentary lull. You see, this is a second job for most of us. Unfortunately, cutbacks in our primary vocation have left us, well, rather frenzied. Once we were able to take time out of our day to entertain you, our loyal followers. Such breaks don't really exist these days. When they do occur we utilize the time to scream very loudly. Shout, shout, let it all out. You know the routine. Sometime in the next couple of weeks we're hoping for a lull in the storm. It may just be a mirage, however. We'll see.

In the meantime, won't you amuse us with some stories of your own?

Posted by mikewolf at 12:51 PM | Comments (4)

July 20, 2003

randomness exposed

Random pictures from random days in the city. More to follow.

Posted by mikewolf at 05:49 PM | Comments (1)

in continued service

Um, Honey Wheat Thins are really, really gross. You're welcome.

Posted by mikewolf at 04:25 PM | Comments (0)

all the president's men

Paul Bremmer, Bush's envoy to Iraq, on Meet the Press this morning:

We're now the world's leading power and with great power comes great responsiblity.

Sound familiar? Yeah. The administration is now turning to Stan Lee for inspiration.

The theme of the film is presented as advice to Peter from his loving uncle: "With great power comes great responsibility" (a line included by script writer David Koepp straight from the Marvel Comics character's original writer, Stan Lee).

I have no words...

Posted by mikewolf at 10:20 AM | Comments (1)

July 19, 2003

whoa

Hey, do any regular readers use Mozilla/Phoenix/Firebird/Netscape? I just opened randomness in an older version of Phoenix and it's all f*cked up. Has that always been going on?

Posted by mikewolf at 10:28 AM | Comments (1)

aquí está el lobo

Still alive, still way too busy. Still love me?

I need to upload/unload a lot of stuff tomorrow. Today I'm meeting Dean and his lovely wife Deb for mass hijinks in the city. Report to surely follow.

Posted by mikewolf at 10:26 AM | Comments (4)

July 10, 2003

sad state

Less than 40% of all Americans registered to vote bothered to cast a ballot in the 2002 General Election. Only a handful bothered to protest the outcome. However, thousands wrote to the FCC to protest the results of "American Idol." We live in a sad, sad world.

Posted by mikewolf at 04:11 PM | Comments (5)

love and theft, indeed

What do you make of this little ditty about Dylan swiping lyrical phrases? Seems too close to be coincidence, does it not? Surely there's no crime in it, it's just interesting.

Posted by mikewolf at 04:01 PM | Comments (15)

your vote needed

I think this is a pretty easy call. It's kinda funny, though. Which of the following is the most impressive line on the resume of Pittsburgh's Randall Simon?

* Being called a "fat monkey" by John Rocker.
* Being the Tiger's offensive leader and still being traded for three no-name minor leaguers.
* Being arrested last night for taking out the Brewers' Italian Sausage with a bat.

When the group went past the Pirates' dugout, Simon took a half swing at the Italian sausage character, hitting her from behind and causing her to tumble. When she fell, she also knocked over the woman dressed as the hot dog.

This sounds like a bad "Murder, She Wrote" episode.

Posted by mikewolf at 03:35 PM | Comments (2)

July 09, 2003

in public service

Note to the woman in front of me today at Dunkin' Donuts drinking a Slim-Fast and eating a bacon, egg & cheese sandwich:

That's probably not going to work out well for you. Just a hunch.

Posted by mikewolf at 01:05 PM | Comments (3)

July 08, 2003

pot smart

I don't know much about pot. I know even less about smuggling it onto an airplane. However, isn't wrapping it in aluminum foil and trying to walk through a metal detector a pretty brilliant plan? I bet he had a bong in his carry-on, too...

Damon Stoudamire, who was arrested on marijuana charges after allegedly trying to pass through an airport metal detector with almost 1½ ounces of the drug wrapped in aluminum foil, was suspended by the Portland Trail Blazers and fined $250,000.
Posted by mikewolf at 01:22 PM | Comments (3)

July 07, 2003

don't hate me 'cause i'm beautiful

None of the promised updates tonight. Why? Because I had a bad day today and I'm cranky. That's why...

Posted by mikewolf at 09:56 PM | Comments (8)

hold the ketchup

I remember Bubble Burgers, but some of these are just a bit too much methinks...

Posted by mikewolf at 04:50 PM | Comments (1)

we're all sailors now.

I know this analysis will excite most of my f*cking potty-mouthed readers.

F*ck. It's the new black.

Posted by mikewolf at 10:04 AM | Comments (4)

July 06, 2003

ever wonder why commercial radio sucks?

We're not in the business of providing well-researched music. We're simply in the business of selling our customers products.
- Lowry Mays, CEO of Clear Channel

More tomorrow. Promise. Including --

*Long-promised photos. Lots of 'em.
*Commentary on the Whitney's The American Effect.
*Thoughts on Capturing The Friedmans.
*A review of Jay Farrar's new solo album and sadly disappointing post Uncle Tupelo output.

I'm feel revitalized. You'll see. If you're not satisfied I'll, um, eat my shoe (insert bad joke here about only wearing one shoe while my foot heals...). Hell, I may do that just for kicks. There are so many potential puns in those two sentences that I don't even know where to begin.

And a note to those of you who count me among your readership... I'm coming back. Promise.

Posted by mikewolf at 05:57 PM | Comments (1)

July 02, 2003

your regularly scheduled programming

Hi. How are you? Super busy, thanks for asking...

I've been in the city for the last couple of days and now have a couple of days to recooperate and then a long weekend. Timing. Ain't it grand? With any amount of luck I'll be boring you with my daily diatribes in no time at all.

In the meantime, how are you? No. Really. How are you?

Oh, and Hubble is delivering a message from E.T..

Posted by mikewolf at 11:28 AM | Comments (2)
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